A Texas cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly gates.

Ball Peen Hammer“Have you ever done anything of particular merit?’ St Peter asked.

“Well, I can think of one thing,” the cowboy offered.

”Once, on a trip to the Black Hills  in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn’t listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker, smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground.’ I yelled, ‘Now back off!! Or I’ll kick the crap out of all of you!!”

St. Peter was impressed, “When did this happen?”

”Just a couple of minutes ago, ” the man replied.