click to view video at LiveLeak
Suspect tells police he “was just swagging”
Indiana Man In Saggy Pants Bust
Suspect, 21, told police he “was just swagging”
AUGUST 18–An Indiana man was arrested last night after cops spotted him with his pants “pulled down to his knees” and his boxer shorts exposed.
Demetrius Russ, 21, was sitting on top of an electrical box talking on his phone when approached by cop Daniel Green. According to an Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department report, after Russ ignored Green’s repeated requests to provide ID, he announced, “You can’t ask me for shit.” Green reported telling Russ that he was “sitting on private property with his pants pulled down on top of an electrical box.”
Russ’s perch can be seen in this Google Street View photo.
When Green asked why his pants were so droopy, Russ noted that he “was just swagging.” The officer replied that, “swagging did not involve exposing your genitals through your boxers because your pants were pulled down all the way.” The term “swagging” generally refers to getting your drink on.
During his interaction with Green, a “belligerent” Russ allegedly cursed frequently and called the cop “nigga and muthafucker on several occasions.” While police contended that Russ appeared drunk, he claimed to have only consumed “one 40 ounce.”
Dumbasses
Rare yellow lobster dies in captivity
Saturday, August 14th 2010, 9:48 AM
Perez/AP
Denny Ingram shows off a yellow lobster he caught in Newport, R.I.
SOUTH KINGSTOWN, R.I. - A rare yellow lobster pulled from Rhode Island’s Narragansett Bay - a one-in-30-million find - was found dead Friday in its protective tank.
The University of Rhode Island, which was keeping the crustacean, said it hadn’t eaten for several days and was “stressed to death” from too much attention.
The yellow lobster was caught last month by lobsterman Denny Ingram.
He temporarily made it available for display in the lobstermen’s co-op building at the State Pier in Newport. Ingram then gave the lobster to URI, which kept the lobster in a secluded protective tank.
[ click to read at NYDailyNews.com ]
More Class Action Idiots
Apple Faces Class Action Suit Because iPad Not Like Book
Apple is a facing a class action lawsuit in California from consumers who feels that Apple’s claim that “reading on the iPad is just like reading a book,” is false.
Follow this link to read the complaint in PDF form. It was filed last week claiming that because the iPad overheats after prolonged use and its poor visibility in sunlight prevent it from living up to Apple’s marketing promise.
From the complaint: “Indeed, according to the www.apple.com website, ‘[r]eading on iPad is just like reading a book.’ However, contrary to this promise, using the iPad is not ‘just like reading a book’ at all since books do not close when the reader is enjoying them in the sunlight or in other normal environmental environments. This promise, like other portions of APPLE’s marketing material for the iPad, is false.”
Via Consumerist.
[ copied in full from MediaBistro - sorry, but we love you ]
Hang The Soulless Bitch Until Dead (And Mis-knot The Noose So She Expires Slowly And With Great Torment)
911 call: Mom in strangling case wanted ‘normal kids’
Jul. 21, 2010 04:29 PM - Associated Press
IRVING, Texas - A Dallas-area mother told a 911 operator she fatally strangled her two young children because they were autistic and she wanted “normal kids.”
Thirty-year-old Saiqa Akhter is jailed on a capital murder charge in the stranglings Monday of 2-year-old daughter Faryaal Akhter and 5-year-old son Zain Akhter at the family’s Irving apartment.
Police on Wednesday released a recording of the mother’s 911 call.
In it, she tells an operator that she first tried to get the children to drink bathroom cleaner before using a wire on their necks.
Asked why, Akhter says, “They’re both not normal, not normal. They’re autistic. Both are autistic.” Pressed further, she said, “I don’t want my children to be like that. … I want normal kids.”
The Internet Ruins Everything It Touches - Even Pleasuring Yourself
I-Dosing: How teenagers are getting ‘digitally high’ from music they download from internet
By DANIEL BATES
Last updated at 5:57 PM on 20th July 2010
They put on their headphones, drape a hood over their head and drift off into the world of ‘digital highs’.
Videos posted on YouTube show a young girl freaking out and leaping up in fear, a teenager shaking violently and a young boy in extreme distress.
This is the world of ‘i-Dosing’, the new craze sweeping the internet in which teenagers used so-called ‘digital drugs’ to change their brains in the same way as real-life narcotics.
Reaction: A teenage boy looks in a state of distress as he listens to an ‘I-Dose’
They believe the repetitive drone-like music will give them a ‘high’ that takes them out of reality, only legally available and downloadable on the Internet.
The craze has so far been popular among teenagers in the U.S. but given how easily available the videos are, it is just a matter of time before it catches on in Britain.
Those who come up with the ‘doses’ claim different tracks mimic different sensations you can feel by taking drugs such as Ecstasy or smoking cannabis.
The reactions have been partially sceptical but some songs have become wildly popular, receiving nearly half a million hits on YouTube.
Under one called ‘Shroom’, Berecz wrote: ‘just listened to this… at the beginning I began to see some blinking light (while eyes closed), then the pitch went up and I began to feel that Im sinking into my chair…as the pitch went down I began to feel confident, and very relaxed, and I dont want to stand up from my chair and I dont want to say any words…’
Not everyone is taking i-Dosing seriously - some YouTube videos show young adults ‘i-Dosing’ on Neil Diamond and mocking the whole phenomenon.
Rainbowgasm
courtesy of Tucker C
I’m not afraid to get sand on my tuxedo if you’re not afraid to let the wind mess your hair up a little bit when I take the top down. (00:50)
The Most Terrible Consequences Of A Very Bad Tea
American cage fighter ‘rips out still-beating heart of training partner after fearing he was possessed by the devil’
WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT
Arrested: Jarrod Wyatt was allegedly found standing naked over his dead friend’s body in a room bathed in blood.
A U.S. cage fighter ripped out the heart of his training partner while he was still alive after becoming convinced he was possessed by the devil, it was alleged today.
Jarrod Wyatt also cut out Taylor Powell’s tongue and ripped off most of his face in a brutal assault that police said looked like a scene from a horror film, officers said.
They claim they found the 26-year-old standing naked over his friend’s body with parts, including an eyeball, strewn around the blood splattered room in Klamath, California.
Wyatt allegedly told police he had drunk a cup of tea spiked with hallucinogenic mushrooms and became convinced Powell was possessed.
According to an autopsy Powell, 21, bled to death after his heart was ripped out. The coroner said Powell had been alive when the organ was ripped out after his chest had been sliced open with a knife. Wyatt told the police he thrown the heart into a fire along with other organs that he had removed from the body, it was claimed.
He allegedly told investigators he cooked the body parts because he was fearful Powell was still alive and he ‘needed to stop the Devil’.
Justin Davis told police he returned to the flat to find Wyatt naked and covered from head to toe in blood. He noticed an eyeball lying in the middle of the floor and saw Powell’s mutilated body.
A lawyer representing Wyatt has claimed the wild mushrooms caused him to act in such a violent way and had not control over his actions. ‘My client was trying to silence the devil,’ said James Fallman.
Where That Gristle In Your Egg McMuffin Comes From
Police: Man sucked into sausage seasoning machine
DANVERS, Mass. (AP) – Police said a cleaning man was taken to a hospital after being sucked into a machine at a sausage-making company in Danvers. The accident happened Thursday night as the man was cleaning the vacuum-type machine that is used to season the meat at DiLigui Sausage Co. Police said the man’s head and shoulders became stuck in the machine after it somehow activated while being cleaned.
Gussied-up Fried Chicken Is A Beautiful Thing
Fried chicken: A beautiful thing
Gussied-up fried chicken made simple at home - Los Angeles Times/Glenn Koenig
Nothing beats the simplicity of a tender, moist piece of meat, delicately seasoned and lightly dredged with a dusting of flour, and then baptized in a pool of sizzling fat to crisp, golden perfection.
Did He Bugger Or Did He Blow ‘Round The Redwood Tree?
from the San Jose Mercury News
Horse tied up, sexually assaulted in Felton
By Cathy Kelly
A Felton woman says her horse was sexually assaulted Monday evening in a pasture near Graham Hill and Mount Hermon roads, according to Santa Cruz County Animal Services.
The horse’s owner told Animal Services that she spotted a man on top of her horse. She said the man ran into the woods when he saw her coming, according to Lynn Miller, the agency’s interim manager.
“It’s very bizarre behavior and very alarming to have someone doing this and you wonder, where next and who next,” Miller said.
The California Penal Code outlines a specific, misdemeanor crime for sexually assaulting an animal, Miller said.
It is very rare that the agency gets reports of such crime, he said.
In Monday’s case, the horse’s owner said she could not initially find her horse when she went to the pasture and began calling out to her, Miller said.
The horse whinnied back and the woman followed the sound and then saw her in another area of the pasture, tied to a redwood tree, he said.
She saw the man pulling up his pants and yelled out and he took off into the woods.
Airport Employee’s Puny Penis Puts Him In The Pokey
Suspicious Package: TSA Worker Jailed After Junk Joke
MIA worker assaults colleague who made crack at genitalia after walk through machine
By WILLARD SHEPARD and BRIAN HAMAC
Miami-Dade Police
Perhaps the new airport body scanners are a bit too revealing.
A TSA worker in Miami was arrested for aggravated battery after police say he attacked a colleague who’d made fun of his small genitalia after he walked through one of the new high-tech security scanners during a recent training session.
Rolando Negrin, 44, was busted for assault after things got ugly at Miami International Airport between Negrin and some of his fellow Transportation Security Administration workers on Tuesday.
Sources say Negrin stepped into the machine during the training session and became embarrassed and angry when a supervisor started cracking jokes about his manhood, made visible by the new machine.
According to the police report, Negron confronted one of his co-workers in an employee parking lot, where he hit him with a police baton on the arm and back.
“[Negron] then told victim to kneel down and say ‘your sorry,’” the report reads. “Victim stated he was in fear and complied with [Negron].”
“a candle with the steam-grilled-on-a-bed-of-onions scent of America’s first fast-food hamburger”
White Castle Celebrates National Hamburger Month With the Launch of a Slyder(R)-Scented Candle
COLUMBUS, Ohio, April 30 /PRNewswire/ – During the month of May, America’s first fast-food hamburger chain will pay homage to the hamburger with online promotions, the launch of a Slyder®-scented candle benefiting Autism, the recruitment of elected officials to work behind the grill and the delivery of “Sealed With A Crave” (S.W.A.C.) gift cases to its biggest celebrity fans.
To commemorate its 18th annual celebration of National Hamburger Month, White Castle has teamed up with Laura Slatkin, often called the “queen” of home fragrances, to introduce a candle with the steam-grilled-on-a-bed-of-onions scent of America’s first fast-food hamburger. Packaged in a ceramic holder that reproduces the signature cardboard sleeve of the White Castle Slyder®, the candles are available in select White Castle restaurants and on the WhiteCastle.com website. Candles sell for $10 each, with net proceeds benefiting Autism Speaks.
Chinese Man’s Bowels Eaten By Voracious Eel Shoved Into His Rectum by “Friends”
Man dies after having eel inserted in rectum during a prank gone awry
In what may be one of the most shocking stories of the year, a man in China died after having an eel inserted into his rectum. Doctors who treated the victim in the Sichuan Province, did not know how the man met his demise until they performed an autopsy and discovered an Asian swamp eel up his backside.
Reports indicate that the man, who has only been identified as a chef, apparently was a victim of a horrible prank. The chef, after a heavy night of drinking, passed out with some of his friends. Those friends thought that it would be funny to put the eel inside of the victim. The medical examiner determined that the cause of death was that the eel, which was fifty centimeters long, devoured the man’s bowels.
