from 9 News Australia (via T. Carney’s Facebook feed)

Man tries to pay bill with spider drawing

Friday, November 14, 2008

By ninemsn staff

Below is the complete email conversation that Adelaide man David Thorne claims he had with a utility company chasing payment of an overdue bill.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Our records indicate that your account is overdue by the amount of $233.95. If you have already made this payment please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles

From: David Thorne
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.37pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
I do not have any money so am sending you this drawing I did of a spider instead. I value the drawing at $233.95 so trust that this settles the matter.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Thankyou for contacting us. Unfortunately we are unable to accept drawings as payment and your account remains in arrears of $233.95. Please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles

From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.32am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
Can I have my drawing of a spider back then please.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.42am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear David,
You emailed the drawing to me. Do you want me to email it back to you?

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles

From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.56am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,

Yes please.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 12.14pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Attached

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 09.22am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Whose spider is that?

Dear Jane, Are you sure this drawing of a spider is the one I sent you? This spider only has seven legs and I do not feel I would have made such an elementary mistake when I drew it.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.03am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, Yes it is the same drawing. I copied and pasted it from the email you sent me on the 8th. David your account is still overdue by the amount of $233.95. Please make this payment as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.05am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Automated Out of Office Response

Thankyou for contacting me. I am currently away on leave, traveling through time and will be returning last week.

Regards, David.

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.08am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Hello, I am back and have read through your emails and accept that despite missing a leg, that drawing of a spider may indeed be the one I sent you. I realise with hindsight that it is possible you rejected the drawing of a spider due to this obvious limb ommission but did not point it out in an effort to avoid hurting my feelings. As such, I am sending you a revised drawing with the correct number of legs as full payment for any amount outstanding. I trust this will bring the matter to a conclusion.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 2.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, As I have stated, we do not accept drawings in lei of money for accounts outstanding. We accept cheque, bank cheque, money order or cash. Please make a payment this week to avoid incurring any additional fees.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 3.17pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

I understand and will definately make a payment this week if I remember. As you have not accepted my second drawing as payment, please return the drawing to me as soon as possible. It was silly of me to assume I could provide you with something of completely no value whatsoever, waste your time and then attach such a large amount to it.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Tuesday 14 Oct 2008 11.18am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Attached

[ click to read at 9 News ]

from the Arizona Republic

China executes man for ant-breeding scheme

Nov. 27, 2008 08:25 AM
Associated Press

BEIJING - China has executed a businessman convicted of bilking thousands of investors out of $416 million in a bogus ant-breeding scheme, state media reported Thursday.

The official Xinhua News Agency said Wang Zhendong, who was found guilty of fraud and sentenced to death in February last year, was executed in north China’s Liaoning province on Wednesday.

The death penalty is used broadly in China. Though usually reserved for violent crimes, it is also applied for nonviolent offenses that involve large sums of money or if they are seen to threaten social order.

Wang, chairman of Yingkou Donghua Trading Group Co., had promised returns of up to 60 percent for investors who purchased ant-breeding kits from two companies he ran. Ants are used in some traditional Chinese medicinal remedies, which can fetch a high price. Wang sold the kits, which cost $25, for $1,300, local media reported earlier.

Wang attracted more than 10,000 investors between 2002 and June 2005, when investigators shut down his companies. The closure of his business set off a panic among small-time players who saw their life savings disappear overnight.

[ click to read full article at AZCentral.com ]

from The Chicago Tribune

A feasible feast
 Savvy use of supermarket products keeps your Thanksgiving fuss-free

By Bill Daley, Chicago Tribune Staff Writer

Thanksgiving dinner conjures up Currier & Ives memories of rosy-cheeked grannies, aided by a phalanx of aunties, sisters and assorted female cousins mustering up a veritable groaning board of goodies while the menfolk chaw away the hours in the front parlor.

But in this 24/7 workaday world, T-Day reality can be quite different.

Don’t despair.

You don’t have to splurge on a fancy dinner to evoke the true spirit and foods of Thanksgiving past. You can still gather the family, however nuclear, around the table and give thanks for what you have and for being together and for pulling a wonderful meal together without getting crazed.

Just be prepared to cheat. A little.

Supermarkets, delis, caterers and restaurants all sell a variety of precooked, ready-to-cook and assemble-X-Y-Z-and-cook dishes you can place on your holiday table. That can lighten the load so you can concentrate on the Thanksgiving dish that really matters to you, be it the roast turkey, the mashed potatoes, the pumpkin pie or the chili-cheese nacho pie you serve up with the football game on TV.

My mother cooked like this for years. She would jazz up packets of frozen onions in white sauce, add her own vegetables to commercially prepared stuffing mixes and pour a can of chicken broth into pan juices to make a quick gravy.

[ click to continue reading ]

from the NY Daily News

Mystery piano, abandoned deep in the woods, baffles Cape Cod police

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Monday, November 24th 2008, 8:48 AM

HARWICH, Mass. - Harwich police have a musical mystery on their hands: Who left a piano in the middle of the woods? And why?

The Baldwin piano discovered in the Bells Neck woods appears to be in perfect working condition and had a matching bench as if it had recently been played.

The piano was discovered Saturday by a woman walking along a path inside a conservation area at the woods.

Another question police would like to answer is how the piano got to such a remote location. The piano is heavy and it took more than a half dozen men to load it onto a truck to remove it.

Police said they’ve notified other police departments in the area to see if anyone has reported a missing piano.

[ click to read at NYDailyNews.com ]

from the NY Daily News

Arkansas man sues McDonald’s over nude photos of his wife

DAILY NEWS STAFF

Sunday, November 23rd 2008, 3:46 AM

If you have naked photos of your wife on your cellphone, be sure to keep it safe.

That’s sound advice a man in Fayetteville, Arkansas failed to heed.

Phillip Sherman mistakenly left his cell phone behind at a local McDonald’s, and now he and his wife, Tina Sherman, are suing the fast food joint for $3 million after nude photos of her that were on the phone found their way to the Internet.

According to the lawsuit, Phillip forgot the phone in July and was assured the employees would keep it safe. However, the naked pictures of Tina ended up online, and the Shermans are blaming the workers at the McDonald’s restaurant.

The couple is seeking damages for suffering, embarrassment and the cost of having to move to a new home.

[ click to read at NYDailyNews.com ]

from the Youngstown Vindicator

Piercings keep husband of student out of dances 

By John W. Goodwin Jr.

HUBBARD — Five pieces of facial jewelry may be all that is stopping a high school senior from attending any school dances with the 19-year-old man she recently married.

Casey Engstrom, 19, graduated from Hubbard High School in 2007. He has since married Brittany, 17, who is still a senior at the high school. The young couple now lives a stone’s throw away from the high school with Casey Engstrom’s grandmother, but Casey Engstrom will not be permitted to attend any school dances with his new wife. Casey Engstrom has been informed that he is banned from such school functions because of skin-stretching jewelry in his lip and ears.

Though Casey Engstrom, who also is his wife’s guardian because she is still a minor, discussed the couple’s feelings about the school’s decision, Brittany Engstrom chose not to speak to The Vindicator and deferred comment to her husband.

Casey Engstrom said the recent ban from school dances is not the first time his appearance has been called into question by school officials. He said he was forced to remove red streaks and highlights from his hair before attending his own graduation in 2007.

The dress code in the student handbook states that “wearing pierced jewelry on any other body part than the ear, such as nose, eyebrows, lips and tongue are not permitted.”

Casey Engstrom, though no longer bound by the student dress code, spoke to school officials to see if an understanding could be reached on the jewelry that would allow him to escort his wife to the school dances. He offered to remove the jewelry.

Buchenic said the school will stand firm on its decision not to allow Casey Engstrom to attend any school dances because of health reasons.

The skin-stretching pieces would leave an open hole in the lip if removed, and removing the jewelry “was not acceptable because fluids could still come out, and I do not want to subject our students to those fluids,” he said. 

[ click to read full story at Vindy.com ]

from the Federal Flippin’ Government

click to download application and get your share of the booty

from Funny Or Die 

from the NY Daily News

Jersey City Councilman Steven Lipski is No. 1 threat at Washington club

BY RICH SCHAPIRO 
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER

Sunday, November 9th 2008, 12:06 AM

A drunken Jersey City councilman was arrested for urinating on a crowd of concertgoers from the balcony of a Washington nightclub, police and club sources said Saturday.

Councilman Steven Lipski was caught relieving himself onto several revelers at the 9:30 Club during a concert by a Grateful Dead tribute band Friday night, club sources said.

“He was very drunk,” the source said, noting that it wasn’t the first time Lipski had caused a ruckus at the popular concert venue.

“We’ve dealt with this man before,” the source added. “He’s never peed on anybody, but he gets really belligerent and drunk.”

[ click to read full article at NYDaily News ]

from the NY Daily News

FBI: United Airlines passenger restrained with duct tape on flight from Puerto Rico to Chicago

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Wednesday, November 5th 2008, 2:50 PM

RALEIGH, North Carolina - An airline crew used duct tape to keep a passenger in her seat because they say she became unruly, fighting flight attendants and grabbing other passengers, forcing the flight to land in North Carolina.

Maria Esther Castillo is due in court Thursday, charged with resisting arrest and interfering with the operations of a flight crew aboard United Airlines Flight 645, from Puerto Rico to Chicago.

Castillo, 45, struck a flight attendant on the buttocks with the back of her hand during Saturday’s flight, FBI Special Agent Peter Carricato said in a criminal complaint filed in U.S. District Court in Charlotte. She also stood and fell onto the head of a blind passenger and later started pulling the person’s hair, the complaint stated.

Ankle cuffs kept slipping off Castillo, so the flight crew and two passengers were forced to use duct tape to keep her in her seat, the complaint states.

She calmed as the pilot diverted the flight to Charlotte-Douglass International Airport, but became disruptive again when authorities boarded the plane to remove her, authorities said.

Carricato states that a passenger saw Castillo having drinks in an airport bar before boarding. She bought another drink on the plane. Flight attendants stopped serving her alcohol because of her behavior, the complaint states.

[ click to read full article at NYDailyNews.com ]

from Funny Or Die

from 23/6 Video

from ThinkGeek.com

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 Internet-Enable your Houseplant

There’s a school of thought that says that plants, like higher animals, have thoughts and feelings. They have an inner voice, and can tell you their life-stories, if only you could speak “plant.” It’s not a difficult language to learn, actually - there are only a few words to contend with, since all they seem to care about is how much water they’re getting. There are no masculine or feminine nouns. Plus, there are no verb tenses, because plants have no concept of linear time.

The original breakthrough was made just a few months ago when the chief scientist at CERN, attempting to converse with a patch of catnip translated through their Milliard Gargantubrain computer, was able to discern “I CAN HAZ TWITTER?” The scientist didn’t quite understand that gibberish, but his granddaughter did, and the Plant Twitter Kit was born.

Once the kit is assembled, connect it to the Internet through the built-in ethernet jack, jam the leads into the plant’s soil, and subscribe to the plant’s twitter feed. It will tell you when it needs watering, or scold you if you’ve overwatered it, and report its status in between. The DIY Plant Twitter Kit comes unassembled, so you’ll have to break out the soldering iron and get to work. Don’t worry, it’s not that difficult to put together, and the satisfaction you get from building your own translation circuit.

 [ click to purchase at ThinkGeek.com ]